Ever had your dishes get so bad you just threw them out? I did. I’ll confess—it happened during a particularly messy chapter of my life. A sink full of dishes turned into something straight out of a horror film, and at some point, the only reasonable solution was to just toss them. But it didn’t stop there. At my old house, I ignored a tiny water leak in the basement that could’ve been an hour fix. A few weeks later, I found mushrooms growing out of my carpet. Mushrooms! Not the cute, fairy-tale kind either. That little leak turned into a much bigger, expensive problem that took way more time, effort, and money to fix than it ever should have.
Why do we let these small, manageable things turn into disasters? It’s not because we’re lazy (so please, no more shaming yourself for it). Often, it’s about our brain chemistry, fear, or just being plain overwhelmed. And for some, like my fellow ADHD folks, it’s a whole other level of struggle.
Why Procrastination Happens (and It’s Not About Laziness)
When you avoid that pile of dishes, that leaky sink, or even that unopened bill on your counter, it’s not because you’re lazy or unmotivated. It’s often a defense mechanism. Our brains want to protect us from discomfort—whether it’s the anxiety of dealing with something right now or the fear that we’ll mess it up. But here’s the kicker: the more we avoid, the more anxiety builds, and the bigger the task feels in our minds. It’s a vicious cycle.
For people with ADHD, it’s even more complicated. ADHD brains are wired to seek out stimulation, and let’s be honest—scrubbing dishes is not exactly dopamine-inducing. ADHD folks struggle with what’s called “executive dysfunction,” where even simple tasks can feel like climbing Mount Everest. It’s not that you don’t want to get it done; it’s that your brain is throwing up roadblocks, making even starting the task feel impossible. Add to that the brain’s love for immediate rewards (Netflix binges, anyone?), and avoidance starts to feel like a comfortable, if temporary, solution.
So before you label yourself lazy or unmotivated, remember this: you’re not. Avoidance is often your brain’s way of saying, “I don’t want to feel uncomfortable right now.” And guess what? That’s human. But here’s the downside—while avoiding may give you a brief moment of relief, it ultimately builds more anxiety, fear, and overwhelm in the long run.
Why Do We Let Small Things Become Big Problems?
It’s easy to let small things pile up. It starts with something like ignoring the dishes in the sink, then it’s leaving that water leak for “tomorrow.” Then, before you know it, you’ve got a situation that requires professional intervention—maybe even a hazmat suit. Our brains are really good at convincing us that “later” is the magic answer, but later often leads to bigger messes and a growing sense of dread.
When those small tasks linger, it creates cognitive overload. Think of it like your brain’s to-do list is getting longer and longer, even if you’re not consciously aware of it. And guess what? Every time you glance at those ignored tasks, anxiety sneaks in like a nosy neighbor, reminding you that it’s still there, waiting.
Breaking the Cycle: How to Handle the Little Things Before They Spiral
Now that we’ve cleared up why we avoid, let’s talk about how to stop doing it before small issues become huge, time-sucking problems. I’d like to pretend I’ve gotten good at this…but, I’m still a disaster. It’s a work in progress!
1. The Two-Minute Rule
If a task takes less than two minutes, do it immediately. Seriously, try this. You’d be amazed at how many things fall into the “quick and done” category. Tossing a load of laundry in, responding to that short email, wiping down the counter—these small wins add up and start clearing that mental clutter.
2. Break It Down
Huge tasks are scary. If you’re staring at a house that looks like a tornado hit it, it’s no wonder you feel overwhelmed. The trick? Break it down. Instead of “clean the house,” think “pick up the laundry” or “wipe down the kitchen counters.” When you start with small actions, the big task becomes much more manageable.
3. ADHD Brain Hack: Gamify It
If you’ve got ADHD, your brain craves stimulation. So make the mundane more exciting. Put on a playlist, set a timer, or challenge yourself to get something done before a song finishes. Your brain loves novelty, and turning chores into a game can help make them more tolerable—dare I say, even fun.
4. Embrace Imperfection
Perfectionism is one of the biggest culprits behind avoidance. How many times have you put something off because you felt you couldn’t do it “just right”? Spoiler: you don’t have to do it perfectly, you just have to do it. Done is better than perfect. If you wait until you can tackle a task flawlessly, you’ll never start. Get comfortable with “good enough” and watch how much easier it becomes to get stuff done.
5. Visualize the End Game
One of the most powerful tools you have is visualization. Imagine how amazing you’ll feel once the task is done—laundry folded, dishes clean, bills paid. That sense of relief and accomplishment can be a huge motivator. Your brain is more likely to get on board if it knows there’s a reward waiting on the other side.
6. Don’t Shame Yourself
Let’s make one thing clear: avoidance doesn’t make you a bad person, and it’s certainly not a reflection of your worth. Life is busy, overwhelming, and sometimes hard. Everyone avoids tasks—it’s part of being human. What’s important is not shaming yourself for it. Forgive yourself for the times you’ve let things slide and focus on taking the next step forward.
Action Time: Face One Small Task
Here’s your challenge. What’s one small task you’ve been avoiding? Maybe it’s that unopened bill, or maybe it’s the clutter on your desk that’s been sitting there for days (or weeks). Ask yourself: why have you been avoiding it? What feelings come up when you think about it—anxiety, fear of failure, overwhelm?
Once you’ve identified it, take a deep breath and get it done. Remember, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Done is better than perfect. And once it’s done, take a moment to enjoy the relief and satisfaction of having cleared that mental space. Trust me, future you will be grateful.