I’m finding it quite hard to concentrate on “real life” at the moment. I’m working my day job. But my mind is pulled to the broader spectrum of the world and what is happening around me.
I have been studying a lot about how to find the answers to life. How did other people find answers? Who is the one answering the questions? Shifting our mindset to one of abundance and freedom and love is important for so many reasons. One of the most pertinent is because it is each individual person who is answering the question.
I almost died just over 6 years ago. I’m still working through that experience. It was a beautiful experience and a life changing one. I made promises to myself that I have both kept and failed to keep. One of them was that I would remember that none of this matters. That the only thing that matters is what I love. So my actions in life need to be intentional toward those people. So that leaving them, when the time comes, doesn’t feel as painful because you know you showed them your love in every way possible.
At 40 years old I started to rediscover myself. I had always been passionate about art. I found painting classes and pottery classes to attend. There is nothing like the feeling of creating something. I wanted to drink out of my mis-formed coffee mug forever. Because I had made it with my own hands. But the handle fell off and turns out it didn’t sit on a table very steadily.
But the experience was still the same. Artistic expression is a great form of release. I went back to writing. I had never really LEFT writing. But I had definitely dimmed my excitement for it. I have written and written and written. And I could go on writing for all the hours that I have free for the rest of my life (probably. this isn’t statistical, k?)
As I discovered the adult, post almost death, “me” I realized that the things I most enjoyed were the same things I enjoyed as a child. My childhood allowed for a lot of creativity. I lived in the golden times of running throughout a small town, drinking from the water hoses and stopping for snacks at whoever’s house was closest (if their Mom bought the good snacks). The world was wide open. Life was slow and life was boring for a kid full of energy. But I found that I could easily entertain myself. I read a lot of books, I spent a lot of time with my friends and I wrote stories and journals. I took good care of myself because I had all the time in the world to focus on my needs.
Times are different for the adult me. You get kicked into this adulting role and the pace picks up, your free time decreasing steadily. Now there are bills to pay and food to buy and people to support. Society is like being drunk on a merry-go-round. What to buy next? What goal to achieve next? The society focused on consumerism is one of little character on the surface. The dizzier you get, the more money you make and the more things you can buy. Sure, you are enjoying your time on the merry-go-round but you are dizzy and off balance. How to know when to jump off?
History is today, just on another day. I’ve written about this before. Today I am incredibly aware of the significance of cultural change and the shifts that I’ve seen happening but have been ignoring. There is a feeling in the air of change. Because humanity is beautiful. Whether you believe in evolution or in a God; whether you were born darker or paler; whether you like to kiss boys or girls or no one at all. Whether rich, just making it or destitute. There are GOOD people. And so many of them.
At the end of the game what matters? Do you know the answer? Is it YOUR answer or an answer someone else provided for you?
Find the good. Be the good. Choose your mindset and take intentional actions to be true to your best self.