Let’s talk about enough. You know, that word that feels like it’s constantly hanging over our heads, just out of reach. Five letters that have the power to make us question every decision we’ve ever made.
“Am I enough? Do I have enough? Have I done enough?”
And let’s be real—when was the last time you actually felt like you were enough? We’ve all been there, doing the mental gymnastics of self-criticism.
So, here’s the trick: who gets to define what is and isn’t enough? I’ll save you the suspense—there’s no right answer. The people telling you that you’re too much or too little don’t hold the power unless you hand it over. The real question we should be asking is, how do we redefine enough for ourselves?
Think about it. Why do we hold back? Why do we shrink ourselves to fit into some arbitrary box of acceptability? Is it fear of rejection? Fear of success? Or maybe just fear of change? Spoiler alert: it’s probably all of the above.
We’ve all been taught to play small in one way or another. Be kind but don’t be a pushover. Be ambitious but don’t overshadow anyone. Be quirky but not too quirky. It’s like we’re all walking this fine line between being enough and being “too much” for the people around us. But what happens when we stop giving a damn about what they think? When we embrace our weirdness and let our true selves shine without hesitation?
Here’s the secret that no one tells you: when you embrace authenticity, you’re the one calling the shots. You’re the only definer of enough. And if you think about it, that’s pretty damn liberating. When you decide that you, just as you are—flaws, quirks, and all—are enough, you take back your power. You stop dimming your light because someone else can’t handle the glare. (Seriously, it’s their problem if they need sunglasses, not yours.)
Mid-life is a perfect time to start questioning this whole “enough” business. After decades of playing by the rules—rules that no one seems to know who made—you start to wonder: What if I made my own rules? What if I decide what’s enough, not society, not my family, not Instagram influencers with their curated highlight reels?
You see, we’ve been tricked into thinking there’s some universal definition of enough that we’re all supposed to follow. But that’s the lie. There is no single standard. What’s enough for you may not be enough for someone else—and that’s okay. In fact, it’s more than okay. It’s necessary. Because at the end of the day, the only one who can define what’s enough for you is you.
So next time you catch yourself trying to fit into someone else’s version of “enough,” ask yourself why. Is it fear talking? Fear of not being liked, of being rejected, of standing out too much? Or is it the discomfort of finally realizing that you were always more than enough—you just weren’t giving yourself permission to see it?
Here’s the challenge: stop holding back. Stop dimming your light. Shine that weird little light of yours as brightly as you want, because the people who matter will love you for it. And as for the others? Well, they can squint.